Elephant bath time in Hampi, India

For a lovely way to start the day in Hampi, set your alarm clock early, and head to the river by Hampi Bazaar (to the point where travellers and locals catch the ferry to the opposite bank, Virupappur Gaddi) for 7.30am.

If you’re lucky you’ll spot Lakshmi, the temple elephant, being led to the river for her daily bath.

You may even enjoy the ultimate ‘power shower’ yourself!

Elephant shower in Hampi

Elephant bath time in Hampi

Elephant in Hampi

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In search of Varkala: Keralan food at Amantha

Amantha is horrible really. A 10 minute walk inland from the showier restaurants lining the Varkala cliffs, it looks a bit more like the kind of place you’d take your car to have its MOT done: dirt floor, plastic chairs, and only a small shanty kitchen to prove it’s a restaurant.

Amantha restaurant, Varkala, KeralaYet somehow we have managed to eat there two days straight.

The reason?

Well, certainly not my jubilant pronouncement the morning after day one that I hadn’t been made ill (although the avoidance of acute amoebic dysentery is a plus point not to be scoffed when travelling – and if we’re being honest, is a comforting sign that your genes and stomach are of the strong). Nor was it the road side ambience, ill-lit at night but with undeniably sweeping views of next door’s newsagents.

No, the reason we went there, and in fact the reason we ventured away from the multitudinous multi-cuisine menus (which essentially offer the same thing) of the restaurants lining the coast, was simple: we wanted to eat proper Keralan food. Not Italian, Tibetan, North Indian, Mexican. But Kerala’s lighter, coconutty, more homely cooking, preferably served on a natty banana leaf (Basically we were missing the wonderful food at Thevercad Homestay).

And Amanthas does just the thing – a fuss-free vegetarian Kerala thali – for a practically free 100 rupees (approx £1).

Thali at Amantha restaurant

For this princely sum you are presented two curries, two ‘dry’ veggie dishes, rice, a chapatti or parotta (the chapatti’s filthy, melt in your mouth, ghee-laden cousin), a poppadom and a banana. Big spenders can opt for a fish thali for an extra 25 rupees.

The dishes are by no means superlative but simple and satisfying. A good kick of tamarind peps up the sambar while the green cabbage thoran is thick with rasped coconut. Portions are generous and staff are warm and welcoming.

The verdict: not too horrible at all.

Where? Opposite Shiva Garden Homestay, North Cliff, Varkala, Kerala (can be reached from the cliffs via the in road at Kerala Bamboo House).

Cost: 240 rupees for 2 veg thalis and 2 big glasses of masala chai

Mdaka Homestead: At home with the Zulus

As the chanting of the Zulus grew louder, we could see torches burning in the dark night, coming closer. Great suspense hung in the air. One by one, our group stood up, leaving our empty plates and stepped out into the bush. Our host clapped his hands, grandly: ‘the boys have arrived, he announced, ‘for dancing’.

Dinner and dancing. As part of my stay at fledgling eco-venture Mbonise’s Mdaka Homestead in Kwa Zulu Natal, a remote part of South Africa, the owners promised us some very traditional entertainment.

A group of boys from the nearby village were coming over to show off their moves. Better still, we heard, they might teach us a few steps too.

In a line, the boys stomped into the garden, all school age, coy, laughing, dressed in casual jeans and t shirts.

Our group -bedraggled, jet-lagged and almost entirely unsuitably dressed – shuffled into a half-circle, as one of the boys took lead. First he began to sing, lift up his knees to apallingly athletic heights and stamp his feet. All we had to do, apparently was follow suit. If you are unfamiliar with traditional Zulu dancing, let me tell you, it is raw, powerful, high spirited and bloody hard work.

And it doesn’t help if you’re wearing a skirt either.

But the energy is magnetic. The beat of your feet as you hit the earth, the rhythm of your muscles and the exposure under the jet night sky feels at once primal and homely.

And this is what the Mdaka Homestead is all about: Making you feel at home.

Dining room at Mdaka Homestead, South Africa

Dining room at Mdaka Homestead, South Africa

Certainly there are some home comforts still missing. When I arrived the three rondavel – round thatched huts – were clean and inviting enough with double and twin beds. But the doors had no locks, there was no storage space, the outdoor showers didn’t work and in order to reach the one toilet we had to go outside, where there was no lighting. Rustic, it is.

But this little place is worth remembering. Mbonise in isZulu means ‘to show’ and this is exactly what the Mdaka Homestead offers: Not just another Zulu show for tourists – but a glimpse into everyday life and what these boys do every night – so that suddenly, you too are a part of it. What you are shown is the everyday and it is this which makes a stay so special.

So if you’re ever in South Africa, passing along the Elephant Coast or driving through the game-filled grassy, hills of Hluluwe National Park, be sure to visit the wonderful people at Mbonise and be prepared to step up to dinner and dancing. Just don’t wear a skirt.

La Route du Miam: A Nice little place I know….

‘Jean Michel, the chef, he wants to quit’, is one of the first things Marie, his wife confides, as she sloshes a delightful aperitif floc de Gascogne into our glasses. ‘The reviews have been terrible. The things people say is awful. We were first and now we are seventh.’ La Route du Miam, we quickly discover, has been tripadvisored.

La Route du Miam in Nice

Quelle horreur.

Oddly, it is the gushing reviews in tripadvisor that led us to La Route du Miam in the first place.

A tiny joint, tucked away in a back street in Nice, where the only thing on the menu is duck and foie gras – we’ve been thinking about it all week. If Well Fed had a tail, it would be thumping.

I walk in a little sceptically. So far the place – no bigger than a shop with little room for a proper kitchen – is empty. But there’s no need to worry. Marie, the owner and our waitress, seats herself comfortably next to us and explains the menu.

About seven dishes long, there’s no need to concentrate. The choices are: half duck with foie gras and stuffing (which somehow accounts for about six of the choices on the list), beef, or the special, which is lamb. Vegetarians beware.

Ed goes for the top option, a larger duck that’s a favourite with the men, whilst I opt for Marie’s favourite, the more ‘petite’ option that’s half mallard, half wild duck. French lesson 1: apparently ‘petite’ in French does not mean small… Take a moment to digest my meal below.

The petite choice at La Route du Miam

Never has food been so wondrously beige.

French lesson 2: La Route du Miam means ‘the yum route’.  Or as I like to loosely translate: the way of sinful overeating and obscene scrumptiousness. Our plates teeter over with a slice of toast topped with a fat wedge of foie gras, half a roasted duck, little roast potatoes topped with fried garlic and almonds and some ridiculously tasty stuffing. Jean Michel is a genius.

Marie pours us more wine and explains why our plate is piled so high: ‘People would come in and eat so much foie gras and bread they couldn’t eat the duck. Now we serve it all at once.

Ed’s duck is larger and the meat the fattier of the two. Mine is absolutely delicious. Succulent meat, perfectly cooked and lighter. But it’s the stuffing that’s the surprise treat. We ask Jean Michel for the recipe. It’s a family secret, he tells us, from his home in Gascony. But we do glean there’s lardons, duck herbs and foie gras in it.

The restaurant is full of happy locals by now and the air is festive. Marie and Jean Michel’s work is almost done and they sit with guests, pop open more wine and pour us a glass from their own bottle. We’re very full and very drunk. It feels like Christmas and we’re beginning to feel like part of the family.

I urge you to go – and tell Jean Michel not to quit.

Nice at dusk

Nice at dusk

Berlin al fresco: Clärchens Ballhaus and Bötzow Privat

Berlin lives out on its streets in summer – whether it’s clattered out on the pavement by some well-worn caff;  putting another wurst on the barbie; or perched on the balcony, taking it all in.  Ask any Berliner for their thoughts on summer (if your German is, like mine, somewhat limited to conversations about the weather and ordering off menus) and they get a dreamy look in their eyes and say: ‘Ah, I fall in love with Berlin in summer!’.

I say this on a Saturday, when it’s actually pretty chilly outdoors.  The weekdays have been maddeningly warm in comparison, which, for a city that knows its right from its left, probably serves us capitalist 9-5ers right.  But maybe i’m just bitter.

In any case, for those of you who happen upon Berlin in a sunnier disposition, here is where I would go to fall in love…

Clärchens Ballhaus – One of those ‘hidden gems’ that’s nonetheless recommended by all the guidebooks, this slightly decrepit old ballroom can still kick up its heels and sits, rather grandly, on August strasse in Mitte. Here you’re greeted by my favourite bit, the courtyard, punctuated by a disco ball and little tables where you can order drinks from waiters in white shirts and waistcoats.

If you can tear yourself away for food (and I would, the pizzas were so-so but you can do better than that) then you’re just a waltz away from Tucholsky strasse, home to the lovely Schwarzwaldstube.  Hands up, I haven’t actually eaten at this place yet – but I can vouch for the smell (mmm) and my jealousy as I sipped a rhubarb drink outside, whilst plates loaded with flammkuchen (a type of German pizza) and spargeln (white asparagus) wafted by. Looking beyond my nose, I caught a lovely the view of the synagogue south down the street.

A short stumble across the strasse and you’ll find Bötzow Privat.  Food here is all hearty berliner fare, thoughtfully presented with a modern twist (think typisch Deutsch but lose the Lederhosen). We took Well-Fed’s parents here for dinner and tucked into excellent boulettes (Berlin burgers that were originally brought over by the French). The fat, hand-made meat patties were pure flavour, no fuss – served with a dollop of creamy sharp mustard and washed down with a delicious Rothaus wheatbeer.

Ah, I fall in love with Berlin in summer!

Eating Berlin: The schön and the shizer…

The schön

  1. Brunch – For eggs all ways, big coffees and bigger cakes, I head to this place..
  2. Wheat beer – I am a beer convert! The rounder fuller flavour trounces the tin can taste of most lager beers.  Make mine an  Erdinger or Franziskaner…
  3. The ubiquitous bread basket – Sod you, Atkins!

The shizer

  1. Harz Käse – Any cheese that contains less than 1% fat is clearly a vegetable.
  2. Tap water – or should I say the lack thereof in Berlin restaurants.
  3. Vietnamese sushi – as likely a pairing as French vegetarians